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My Leap

By October 21, 2015

Leap Art by Roz

I did it. I’ve been dreaming, planning, wishing, hoping, talking, thinking, agonizing, second-guessing for over a year, and last week, I finally did it. I left my career behind. After what I realized last September, you’d think my career change would be an easy decision to make. I clearly wasn’t happy being a lawyer. Why didn’t I leave sooner? What was I waiting for? My resolve was there, but acting upon it was something else entirely. It was the most difficult career decision I have ever made.

Change is hard. No. Change is damn near impossible. I like the company I was working for. I believe in its mission. They do good things. My boss valued and respected me. He wanted me and my colleagues to succeed. My coworkers and I made a formidable team, we always had each other’s backs, and they are among some of my dearest friends. So. Yeah. Telling everyone I was resigning sucked. Even though I dreaded doing the work every day, I loved being with those people every day. Saying goodbye to the environment was bittersweet.

It is also damn near impossible to explain to others what it is that I’m planning to do. Because let’s be honest, I don’t totally know yet. Although I have ideas, they aren’t fully fleshed out, and they are super hard to explain with any confidence to other people. Let me try with you, and please let me know what you think.

I’m going to write. This is where people cock their heads at me, narrow their eyes a bit, and ask the dreaded question, “write what?” I explain the SpitfireMom Society to them and can read their minds as they think “oh, what a fun hobby. But what is she going to do?” I tell them I want to launch my own site and start freelance writing and they look puzzled. Anytime you utter the word “freelance” to someone in corporate America their thoughts jump to “unemployed.” Then I start to stammer on about my grander ideas. I’m not great at writing fiction, but I’d like to spend some time working on it. I really think I can write nonfiction. And I have a hell of a story in mind, but it’s not one I’m ready to share. So their judgment falls into place: “She has no fucking idea what she’s going to do. She’s totally lost it.”

I’m going to teach. I have discovered that although I don’t like practicing law, I do still find it fascinating and I like helping others understand it as it applies to them. I have great ideas in mind for medical students and residents, and I’d love to launch that into a viable business. My experience – professionally as a health care lawyer and personally as the spouse of a physician – have shown me over and over that legal education for physicians is a gaping hole in their training. And I’d love to teach a law school class, but I have to get over the insulting stipend adjunct professors earn in this country.

I’m volunteering.  I’ve never had the time to be a room mom or to volunteer regularly at my kids’ school. I’m doing both this year and I’m on the board of directors for my sons’ soccer club. I’d like to find other opportunities too – talking to school kids about the constitution, delivering gifts at the children’s hospital on Christmas day, baking challah and hamentaschen during the holidays at my synagogue.

I’d like to achieve some personal goals too. I’m going to regain control of my own health and, in turn, that of my family. Less going out to eat. Less take-out. More healthy and delicious meals prepared at home. More exercise. And someday, the laundry will be done and the house will be organized. (Who am I kidding? Perhaps when the boys leave for college.)

I could launch this post into a discussion about staying at home versus working full time, because some of my friends and acquaintances think I’ve stepped away from practicing law to be a stay at home mom. I won’t touch that debate with a ten foot pole, in large part because it’s a false and damaging conversation. You do what’s best for you and your family and it’s nobody else’s business. End of story. Since having kids I’ve almost done it all – I’ve stayed home, worked part time, and worked full time. Now it’s time to tackle the final frontier – working for myself from home. It’s going to take some time to get my writing/speaking/teaching hybrid up and running. And yes, I want to be done at 3:30 every day so that I can pick up the boys and get them to soccer practice on time. Stay tuned.

Leap art by Roz

Update: My Rodan + Fields Regime

By September 21, 2015

Hi guys!
So it’s been just over a month since I embarked on a new skincare routine, using Rodan + Fields. To recap – since moving to Denver 2 years ago, I’ve been struggling with my skin. The move from moisture-rich San Francisco, to arid and extremely sunny Denver, add to that some prescription medicine that makes me extremely sensitive to the sun, and it’s resulted in enhanced wrinkles, dry, bumpy skin and loss of firmness.

After one month on Rodan + Fields Redefine Regimen, Eye Cream, and Hand Treatment I’m happy to say my skin is SO much happier. My skin is smoother, firmer and the nicest part…there is a GLOW. Do I still have wrinkles? of course…it’s eye cream not a miracle! ha. But I do notice a diminishment. Honestly, my skin really does look and feel much better.

The routine overall has been pretty easy to acclimate too. I’m not perfect though, and have missed some nights with the cleanser, and haven’t been as diligent with the hand treatment as I’d like. Like I said … honest!

rodan and fields

Don’t you love my glamour shots??

rd30update_hand

So followup with me in 30 days for my final review of Rodan + Fields Redefine Regimen.

If you’re an R+F user, I’d love to hear and see your results!

~ Heidi

 

Connect with my R+F rep, Deanna here:
Website   /  Facebook   /  Instagram

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Note: Products were provided by Rodan + Fields consultant Deanna Koether. All opinions and styling are our own.

 

School Fundraisers (AKA the fourth circle of Hell)

By September 16, 2015

September is here. The evening air is a little cooler, the leaves are turning in the mountains, and the grocery stores are well stocked with mums, Honeycrisp apples and Halloween candy. The kids are fully in the swing of things at school. We’re enjoying the sweet spot of the school year when assignments aren’t too hard yet and I’m not completely disorganized yet. Fall is my absolute favorite time of year. I could happily live within only the months of September, October and November forever. They are quite nearly perfect. Save one horrible, awful, soul-killing activity: school fundraisers.

Little boy saving coin in a money jar

We’ve been asked to buy every imaginable sweet treat and snack: candy, chocolates, cookie dough, cheesecakes, butter braids, honey, cinnamon rolls, nuts, popcorn, and pretzels. We’ve flipped listlessly through catalogs of kitchen supplies in search of something we may use once or twice. These items invariably include every infomercial gimmick since 1987. Ginzu knives? Check. Tupperware? Yup. Quesadilla maker, anyone? Microwave your poached eggs! There are rolls upon rolls of wrapping paper for every occasion, which sometimes can actually be of really nice quality, but my 30 rolls of wrapping paper hoarded in a corner of the basement make it clear that I do not need any more. Ever. We’ve purchased magazines, coupon books, gift cards. The latest request this fall was, get this – mattresses.

It’s one thing to be asked to buy these things from nieces and nephews, your friends’ and coworkers’ children. A box of Girl Scout cookies here, a tub of neon orange popcorn there, a Tempurpedic mattress…um…no biggie, right?. But it’s another thing entirely to peddle this crap yourself. I know damn well nobody wants to buy any of it because I don’t want to buy any of it. What’s worse is that the fundraising companies typically brainwash our babies with “prizes” (i.e. unused Happy Meal toys from Taiwan) and you have to listen to three weeks of your kids begging you to take the order form to work, the gym, the neighbors, and to call every distant relative they can think of so that they might win the coveted glow-in-the-dark wall-mounted basketball hoop with matching bracelet. Read More

Low Maintenance Gorgeous

By September 2, 2015

Last week I was chatting with my dear friend Olivia, catching up on what felt like forever.  As usual I am always inspired by her style and grace. We talked fashion, comfort and still looking cool while managing a full family, business and life.  So it just made sense today to reshare her post about low maintenance beauty. Shine on!

I’m on a low maintenance beauty kick these days. As I edge toward forty, I realize that I spent the entirety of my twenties and thirties consumed with staying skinny. It was truly pathetic how much wasted creative energy went into that one stupid cause. I wish I could have those years of creative energy back. What I would like to proffer here, is a new beauty regimen for women. It was actually very much in practice in the 1970s: the forgiving dress, and the groomed face.

The Forgiving Dress

In the 1960s and 70s, women wore what were called Hostess Dresses or caftans. They were often long sleeved, loose fitting long dresses. We might even call them MuMus nowadays. They flattered a woman’s neckline and skimming her ankles, revealed pretty shoes or painted toes. They were modest and also pretty and usually were sewn from a wildly colorful or amusing fabric. My mother wore some very pretty ones, usually from I. Magnin, the grand, now defunct California department store. I remember her cooking for a dinner party up until the last minute, her hair in curlers, until the doorbell rang and she’d say “Let them in!” and she’d race upstair to throw on her Hostess dress. In one fell swoop, she’d be changed and ready downstairs, looking gorgeous.

There is a current vogue for the Maxi dress, but many of these are sleeveless/strapless and look like beach coverups. I prefer the 1970s versions were more like the Moroccan Jalaba, caftan, or Indian kurta, but longer than that. They suggest rather than reveal every inch. They focus attention to the face. Not the ass. They are ladylike and fun. I want to have a wardrobe full of them.

Low Maintenace Gorgoues_with mumu

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Dads of Instagram

By August 31, 2015

My husband and I have a good friend, Sam, who says he loves my posts on SpitfireMom. We’ve had some great conversations that have stemmed from my writing (the most revelatory that we both have gay moms!) but the one theme that keeps popping up between us is that he wishes there was something similar out there for a guy like him. Sam is a single dad to one of the most delightful young women I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. His daughter is bright, athletic, mature, playful, and just plain fun. Our boys worship her. Any babysitter who will play soccer and lacrosse with you and then head inside to make chocolate chip cookies is a keeper. They have a sweet and supportive relationship. He adores her, and the feeling is clearly mutual. So I started looking for a SpitfireDad equivalent. Although I haven’t found our exact male counterpart, I was pleased to find that the daddy blog universe is growing exponentially on Instagram. Here are four dads you’ll love to follow.

Designer Daddy – Brent Almond started up the Designer Daddy blog a year after he and his husband adopted their son. Brent is a graphic designer and illustrator. His blog is super fun, as is his @DesignerDaddy Instagram account, but it’s his @SuperLunchNotes that I love most. The lunch notes he draws on his son’s napkins are adorable, inspiring, and so, so fun! Bonus – he sells the napkins in his Etsy store if you’re not so artistically inclined.

@LifeWithMicah chronicles the daily adventures of Micah Quinones, a fun-loving, spunky and determined baby boy with a model mom and designer dad. Micah was diagnosed with Down Syndrome when he was three months old. His mom uses his Instagram fame in part to give hope to other families facing a Down syndrome diagnosis.

@TiesandFries is married to Naomi of the Love Taza blog. They have three adorable kids and are happy New Yorkers.

@DrBobbyBones, aka Dr. Bob Cho, is the other half to Joy Cho of Oh Joy! He’s also a surgeon and daddy to two of the most beautiful little girls you’ll ever see. Bob’s pictures of their girls will melt your heart.

I’ll keep looking for some Spitfirey dads to share with you (and Sam). If you have suggestions, please fill us in! Share on our Facebook or instagram with the hashtag #dadsofinstagram !